Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What a night!

Well yesterday Sophie had her shots. A total of three in the thighs and man was she mad. She was doing fine until about midnight then she woke up with a fever. We gave her some tylenol and cuddled her for a bit and put her back to bed... Well she fell back asleep until about 1:30 and from then on she was pretty much up! Sleep for 10 minutes and then scream, sleep and scream all night long! I was exhausted! We even tried putting her in bed with us but nope that didn't help either. From no sleep and being 8 weeks pregnant I was also feeling REALLY sick to my stomach and Chris told me to take a nap around 1:15pm... Well Sophie was asleep in our room in her playpen and I walked in and she was turned away from me on her stomach playing with some PJ's of hers she pulled down off the side of her playpen. I yelled "Chris" and she jumped and started screaming! I have never seen her so startled! I picked her up and tried to comfort her but she wasn't having it. It was so sad, she was crying so hard she was sighing! Chris took her and she settled down and then I held her while he was making her bottle and as soon as she landed in my arms she started screaming again. So he took her back and I made the bottle and I went to give it to her, she looked at me and started crying again! I felt so bad, I didn't mean to scare my baby! I took a nap for about 45 minutes and Chris came in because he needed to go get his license renewed before they closed and now baby's sleeping, big kids are gone, and mama is all alone..... Now what to do?! ;)

Monday, September 19, 2011

Nightmares?

Well every once in awhile I have these.... Nightmares... It's the only way I know how to describe them. Well this morning was one of those times. Now in the past when I've had one, I've always been alone in bed sleeping and it's always the same concept... Something (doll, demon, etc.) is chasing me. It's always something demonic and evil and as I try to get away, to make this thing go away I TRY to say "In Jesus' name go away!" except I can NEVER make out those words. I try over and over and over! When I FINALLY make out those words, I wake up!

Well this morning I had one of those dreams while my husband let me sleep in a little. I was in my husband's grandparents' house and a demonic looking woman was standing diagonal on the corner of the dresser screaming at me while I was holding my youngest daughter Sophie. It then jumped down and started running towards me trying to get Sophie. At this point my husband grabbed Sophie and ran out of the house, hoping that this would all stop. Nope, it told me it wanted the baby that I'm carrying and pinned me to the bed. At this point I started trying my best to say "In Jesus' name go away!" It wouldn't come out... Over and over without stopping I repeated this and I just couldn't speak these words. I could yell "HELP!" and other things but for the life of me could not make out these words. When I finally did make out the words, I woke up! I woke up screaming "Help!"

This brings me to a few months ago when I had a dream like this... Sophie was about a month and a half old and my husband was sleeping with Cheyanne because she wasn't feeling too well. Well that night Sophie slept in bed next to me and the dream I had made it so I will never put her in bed with me again. My dream was that Sophie was laying there sleeping and all of a sudden she sat up and in a demonic creepy voice said "Hi Mommy! I'm not really your baby, I'm here to kill you!" and started crawling towards me. During this time, her face completely twisted up, she looked evil. I picked her up and ran to the bathroom (remember this is all a nightmare!) and started smashing her down on the sink over and over until she exploded into a million pieces. Again during this dream I'm trying so hard to say "In Jesus' name go away!" but can't make it out. I finally am able to say it and I wake up! I thank GOD that my baby was still sleeping next to me, so peaceful and untouched. God forbid I actually hurt my baby because one of these dreams! I think God was really looking out for us at that time, putting his hands on my baby so I didn't end up hurting in my sleep. After that, Soph has NEVER slept in bed with me again.

These dreams are so demonic and evil... And they always seem to be at a time where I'm so in touch with God. It scares me to pieces and I don't even know what to do about it. I told my husband it happened again and he thinks I need to start sleeping with a rubber band because I'm always wearing my same clothes and maybe my subconscious will help remind me to snap the band to wake me up... I hope this works.

Besides that dream I've been having nightmares, well more like night terrors. I open my eyes and see things that aren't there (mainly spiders) and completely freak out and start screaming, my husband is trying to turn on a light and calm me down, thinking I'm dying or something... What's wrong with me?!

Friday, September 16, 2011

Intro!

I decided to start a blog because I'm so busy that sometimes I forget what I've done last week! My name is Ashley and I have three wonderful daughters, Alexus, Cheyanne, and Sophie. I married the love of my life on July 7, 2011. We planned on having another baby shortly after we got married and it happened quick! I had a chemical pregnancy and the next month conceived this little Sweet Pea. We are hoping for a boy but will be so happy with a baby girl!

Introducing our Sweet Pea!